Baby Bush

16 Nov 2012 - 09:31:18 am
Little did i know that my first visiting day in Federal Government Girls' College would be a disaster.
Just like it would have been expected for every tiny pinchomic little girl in the boarding house, it was a bright saturday morning for me. Yes, i was relatively small, in the real sense of the word. It was a saturday with a difference because it was our first visiting day.
We had just finished our saturday inspection routine and it was always a worthy experience. All the extra cleaning technique, dressing the beds in style, using stones to make inscriptions on the floor, drawing patterns on the sand with broom, just in a bid to impress inspectors who already have their minds made up never to be impressed by red house girls endeavours. Especially when our house mistress was a case study.
Done with this beauty charade, our seniors (God bless their souls) chose a very pleasant hobby to pass their time and select raw materials (that we were) for the october school daughter rush. They gathered us together and started tales upon tales on stories that touches the heart about hostel life.
The midnight walkers, naked man, madam koi koi, Baby bush, ghosts of the coast, were the top stories that won the day. We all sat at their mercy, listening and praying unto God to save us from the lion's den, just like he delivered Daniel.
TO GOD BE THE GLORY; another priviledged junior girl who managed to escape the tales came in to alert me that my parents were around. My joy knew no bounds. I could feel the sympathetic eyes of my mates piercing into my skin as i ran out of the hostel.
Seeing my parents again after a very long time was the greatest event of the millenium. In return, they provided me with every delicacy i had missed since i went back to school. I had a lot of catching up to do. What was more delicious than home food?
I engaged myself in a one-man eating competition. I was very sure of the fact that every bit of food in my flask was consumed. Who knows when i'll get to have another taste of home food. I was yet to find out more about over feeding.
Everywhere was dark and quiet. The only noise i heard was the rumbling and bombing going on in my stomach and the weight of the abubakar'ed fart i released.
'God please,save me from this running stomach. Let it just hang on till morning.' but my stomach was in a big hurry to get rid of what i stuffed inside it. It was becoming serious and deadly. I checked my wrist watch; 2:00am. Perfect! Exactly the time of the witches. Heavenly father! Who said ignorance wasnt bliss? The tales by moonlight our seniors stuffed inside my head started revolving. The speed the images flashed in my head corresponded with the war going on in my stomach.
I cancelled the option of waking anybody up because my only alternatives would have been fellow junior girls and they had all attended the lecture with me. Who wanted to die young?
For Christ's sake, i'm a pastor's daughter and so reciting the popular psalms 23 portion of the Bible, i took off to the toilet.
I could bet my life on the fact that the devil was laughing out his ass as he saw me journeying to the toilet because he had prepared a package for me. His greatest weapon is what we feed into our minds.
Clutching my nylon bag with all confidence, i headed to the shot put arena. Shot putting was the easiest, fastest and most enjoyable form of defecating. The throwing aspect was the most fascinating. On a normal day and circumstance, i would stand with the few friends i had and we'll measure who has the farthest throw.
But as i positioned myself to release the nasty shit, i heard a cry. It was the cry of a baby. My red alarm blew. The story had it that baby bush had the cry of a baby.
Without hesitation, the running stomach seized. My ass went dry. I stood from my stool and my eyes darted around the bush. I searched the darkness and peered into its meaning. The cry persisted. I followed the sound and i saw a figure. It seemed to be moving towards me. My blood drained out.

...... To be continued.
Admin · 144 views · 10 comments
Categories: gossip, Adventure

Permanent link to full entry

http://oma3.sosblogs.com/The-first-blog-b1/Baby-Bush-b1-p2.htm

Comments

Comment from: Lanre [ Visitor ] Website
Brilliant piece. Never expected anything less.
   2012-11-16 @ 11:10:23 am
Comment from: Admin [ Member ]
Tnx dear
   2012-11-16 @ 01:13:44 pm
Comment from: fionaflora [ Visitor ]
Christie!infact,ur more than wonderful.u should hv seen me laughing my eyes out in my room.pple around me seriously thought i had suddenly gone mad.pls keep it up bestie.and complete d piece...
   2012-11-17 @ 02:55:58 pm
Comment from: fionaflora [ Visitor ] Website
Christie!infact,ur more than wonderful.u should hv seen me laughing my eyes out in my room.pple around me seriously thought i had suddenly gone mad.pls keep it up bestie.and complete d piece...
   2012-11-17 @ 02:57:05 pm
Comment from: fionaflora [ Visitor ] Website
Christie!infact,ur more than wonderful.u should hv seen me laughing my eyes out in my room.pple around me seriously thought i had suddenly gone mad.pls keep it up bestie.and complete d piece...
   2012-11-17 @ 02:58:00 pm
Comment from: Admin [ Member ]
Tnx hon. U remain ma best nd ur encouragement kips me going. Over to d nxt tori
   2012-11-17 @ 04:27:44 pm
Comment from: Emyo D Cosmoe [ Visitor ]
I woke this sunday morning, saw this and taught its too long, but the comments forced me to read through.
I did never regret the piece from this potential author.
Hilarious and straight.
This got me laughing.

' But as i positioned myself to release the nasty shit, i heard a cry. It was the cry of a baby. My red alarm blew. The story had it that baby bush had the cry of a baby.
Without hesitation, the running stomach seized. My ass went dry.'
   2012-11-18 @ 07:14:53 am
Comment from: Emyo D Cosmoe [ Visitor ]
I woke this sunday morning, saw this and taught its too long, but the comments forced me to read through.
I did never regret the piece from this potential author.
Hilarious and straight.
This got me laughing.

' But as i positioned myself to release the nasty shit, i heard a cry. It was the cry of a baby. My red alarm blew. The story had it that baby bush had the cry of a baby.
Without hesitation, the running stomach seized. My ass went dry.'
   2012-11-18 @ 07:16:02 am
Comment from: Emyo D Cosmoe [ Visitor ]
I woke this sunday morning, saw this and taught its too long, but the comments forced me to read through.
I did never regret the piece from this potential author.
Hilarious and straight.
This got me laughing.

' But as i positioned myself to release the nasty shit, i heard a cry. It was the cry of a baby. My red alarm blew. The story had it that baby bush had the cry of a baby.
Without hesitation, the running stomach seized. My ass went dry.'
   2012-11-18 @ 07:18:19 am
Comment from: DailyNews [ Visitor ] Website
Lolz, Exty finally you made it...nice job dearie...proud to be your fan, YAN is going higher by the day...nice piece, please keep it coming okay?
   2012-11-21 @ 11:06:42 am

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